IRSYAD AL-HADITH SERIES 428: HADITH ON AISHA’S JEALOUSY BECAUSE WOMEN WANT TO MARRY THE PROPHET PBUH

irsyad al hadith 428

Question:

I once heard a hadith where Saiyidatina Aisha R.Anha was jealous because many women offer themselves to be married to the Prophet PBUH. Can SS Mufti explain the hadith?

 

Answer:

Alhamdulillah, praise and thanks to Allah for the countless blessings He has blessed us all with. Blessings and salutations to the Prophet Muhammad PBUH, his wives, his family, companions and all those that follow his teachings to the day of judgement.

وَامْرَأَةً مُّؤْمِنَةً إِن وَهَبَتْ نَفْسَهَا لِلنَّبِيِّ إِنْ أَرَادَ النَّبِيُّ أَن يَسْتَنكِحَهَا خَالِصَةً لَّكَ مِن دُونِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ ۗ قَدْ عَلِمْنَا مَا فَرَضْنَا عَلَيْهِمْ فِي أَزْوَاجِهِمْ وَمَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُهُمْ لِكَيْلَا يَكُونَ عَلَيْكَ حَرَجٌ ۗ وَكَانَ اللَّـهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا

تُرْجِي مَن تَشَاءُ مِنْهُنَّ وَتُؤْوِي إِلَيْكَ مَن تَشَاءُ ۖ وَمَنِ ابْتَغَيْتَ مِمَّنْ عَزَلْتَ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْكَ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ أَدْنَىٰ أَن تَقَرَّ أَعْيُنُهُنَّ وَلَا يَحْزَنَّ وَيَرْضَيْنَ بِمَا آتَيْتَهُنَّ كُلُّهُنَّ ۚ وَاللَّـهُ يَعْلَمُ مَا فِي قُلُوبِكُمْ ۚ وَكَانَ اللَّـهُ عَلِيمًا حَلِيمًا

“… and a believing woman if she gives herself to the Prophet [and] if the Prophet wishes to marry her, [this is] only for you, excluding the [other] believers. We certainly know what We have made obligatory upon them concerning their wives and those their right hands possess, [but this is for you] in order that there will be upon you no discomfort. And ever is Allah Forgiving and Merciful.

You, [O Muhammad], may put aside whom you will of them or take to yourself whom you will. And any that you desire of those [wives] from whom you had [temporarily] separated - there is no blame upon you [in returning her]. That is more suitable that they should be content and not grieve and that they should be satisfied with what you have given them - all of them. And Allah knows what is in your hearts. And ever is Allah Knowing and Forbearing.”

Surah al-Ahzab (50-51)

According to Sheikh Wahbah al-Zuhaily, this verse states one of the lawful categories of women to be married by the Prophet PBUH which is believing women who offer themselves. There are two valid conditions of marriage through hibah (women offer themselves to be married to), which is when a woman offers herself to the Prophet PBUH and a certainty of that the Prophet PBUH wants to marry her… This marriage without mahar (dowry), wali and eyewitness is specified only for the Prophet PBUH.

However, according to Ibnu ‘Abbas RA and Mujahid, the Prophet PBUH never accept offers from any woman who offers herself to be married to him. This denies the claim by some individuals who said that the Prophet PBUH was married to many wives because of lust and desire. If the claim is true, then surely the Prophet PBUH will marry any woman who offers herself to him, especially when the marriage can take place without wali, eyewitness and mahar (dowry). (Refer Tafsir al-Munir 22/65)

The cause for revelation of this verse is because many women at that time offered themselves to be married to the Prophet PBUH. Narrated by Abu Hisham RA:

كَانَتْ خَوْلَةُ بِنْتُ حَكِيمٍ مِنَ اللاَّئِي وَهَبْنَ أَنْفُسَهُنَّ لِلنَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَقَالَتْ عَائِشَةُ أَمَا تَسْتَحِي الْمَرْأَةُ أَنْ تَهَبَ نَفْسَهَا لِلرَّجُلِ فَلَمَّا نَزَلَتْ ‏{‏تُرْجِئُ مَنْ تَشَاءُ مِنْهُنَّ‏}‏ قُلْتُ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ مَا أَرَى رَبَّكَ إِلاَّ يُسَارِعُ فِي هَوَاكَ

Khaula bint Hakim was one of those ladies who presented themselves to the Prophet (ﷺ) for marriage. `Aisha said, "Doesn't a lady feel ashamed for presenting herself to a man?" But when the Verse: "(O Muhammad) You may postpone (the turn of) any of them (your wives) that you please,' (33.51) was revealed, " `Aisha said, 'O Allah's Messenger (ﷺ)! I do not see, but, that your Lord hurries in pleasing you.'"

Sahih al-Bukhari (4823)

Another narration is by Aisha R.Anha herself:

كُنْتُ أَغَارُ عَلَى اللاَّتِي وَهَبْنَ أَنْفُسَهُنَّ لِرَسُولِ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم وَأَقُولُ وَتَهَبُ الْمَرْأَةُ نَفْسَهَا فَلَمَّا أَنْزَلَ اللَّهُ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ ‏{‏ تُرْجِي مَنْ تَشَاءُ مِنْهُنَّ وَتُؤْوِي إِلَيْكَ مَنْ تَشَاءُ وَمَنِ ابْتَغَيْتَ مِمَّنْ عَزَلْتَ‏}‏ قَالَتْ قُلْتُ وَاللَّهِ مَا أَرَى رَبَّكَ إِلاَّ يُسَارِعُ لَكَ فِي هَوَاكَ

I felt jealous of the women who offered themselves to Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) and said: Then when Allah, the Exalted and Glorious, revealed this:" You may defer any one of them you wish, and take to yourself any you wish; and if you desire any you have set aside (no sin is chargeable to you)" (xxxiii. 51), I ('A'isha.) said: It seems to me that your Lord hastens to satisfy your desire

Sahih Muslim (1464)

Words uttered by Saiyidatina Aisha R.Anha in the above verse should be understood carefully so that we will not have bad perception towards the Prophet PBUH and Saiyidatina Aisha herself.

According to Imam al-Nawawi, the words of Aisha means Allah SWT give leniency, wideness and choice towards the Prophet PBUH in many things. (Refer Syarh al-Nawawi ‘ala Muslim 10/50)

While according to Imam al-Qurtubi, the words of Aisha comes from the feeling (al-ghirah) and the need of being pampered and consoled by the Prophet PBUH (al-dallal), and this matter may be seen in two other situations related to the Prophet PBUH and Aisha R.Anha.:

  1. Narrated by Aisha R.Anha:

قَالَ لِي رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏"‏ إِنِّي لأَعْلَمُ إِذَا كُنْتِ عَنِّي رَاضِيَةً وَإِذَا كُنْتِ عَلَىَّ غَضْبَى ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَتْ فَقُلْتُ وَمِنْ أَيْنَ تَعْرِفُ ذَلِكَ قَالَ ‏"‏ أَمَّا إِذَا كُنْتِ عَنِّي رَاضِيَةً فَإِنَّكِ تَقُولِينَ لاَ وَرَبِّ مُحَمَّدٍ وَإِذَا كُنْتِ غَضْبَى قُلْتِ لاَ وَرَبِّ إِبْرَاهِيمَ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَتْ قُلْتُ أَجَلْ وَاللَّهِ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ مَا أَهْجُرُ إِلاَّ اسْمَكَ

I can well discern when you are pleased with me and when you are annoyed with me. I said: How do you discern it? Thereupon be said: When you are pleased with me you say;" No, by the Lord of Muhammad," and when you are annoyed with me, you say:" No, by the Lord of Ibrahim." I said: Allah's Messenger, by Allah, I in fact leave your name (when I am annoyed with you).

Sahih Muslim (2439)

  1. The same happened in the incident of fitnah hadith al-ifk where Aisha R.Anha was accused by the munafiq (hypocrites) when the Prophet PBUH brought good news from Allah SWT:

يَا عَائِشَةُ، أَمَّا اللَّهُ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ فَقَدْ بَرَّأَكِ ‏"‏‏.‏ فَقَالَتْ أُمِّي قُومِي إِلَيْهِ‏.‏ قَالَتْ فَقُلْتُ وَاللَّهِ، لاَ أَقُومُ إِلَيْهِ، وَلاَ أَحْمَدُ إِلاَّ اللَّهَ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ

'O `Aisha! Allah has declared your innocence!' Then my Mother said to me, 'Get up and go to him (i.e. Allah's Messenger ()). I replied, 'By Allah, I will not go to him, and I praise none but Allah

Sahih al-Bukhari (4750)

Attributing lust and desire towards the Prophet PBUH is something that should be avoided as a form of honoring the Prophet PBUH. Imam al-Qurtubi also added, how good it is if Aisha substitute the phrase ‘hawa’ with ‘redha’, and surely, this is far better and more appropriate. (Refer Al-Mufhim lima Asykala min Talkhis Kitab Muslim 4/211)

These words of Imam al-Qurtubi also narrated by Imam Ibn Hajar in his book Fath al-Bari and this signifies that he also agrees with the opinion of Imam al-Qurtubi. (Refer Fath al-Bari 9/165)

While according to Sheikh Nuruddin al-Sindi, Aisha R.Anha views the actions of the women who offer themselves to be married to as an indecent behavior, and she (Aisha) wanted to prevent the Prophet PBUH from getting involved with the matter. While the words “It seems to me that your Lord hastens to satisfy your desire” is a form of metaphor by Aisha which indicates that she did not have bad perceptions towards the women anymore after the above saying of Allah SWT is revealed which gives choices to the Prophet PBUH to marry those women or not.

In other words, Aisha seemingly wants to say: Before, I forbid the women from offering themselves to be married to the Prophet PBUH, but when I found out that Allah SWT is the One who fulfill the desire of the Prophet PBUH, I become content with the situation. (Refer Hasyiyah al-Sindi ‘ala Sunan al-Nasa’ie 6/54)

Conclusion

Consequently, we state that the words of Saiyidatina Aisha R.Anha comes from the feeling of jealousy which is a human nature, and the words are forgiven by syarak.

Saiyidatina Aisha R.Anha as an ummul mu’minin, a god-fearing person and whose heart is filled with faith also did not have the intention to go against the commandment of Allah SWT and His Prophet PBUH. However, as a mere human being, she also has the attributes of a human which is created by Allah within each human.

Wallahua’lam.